so many moods in one day can be hazardous. ended up drinking a double shot espresso thing that starbucks makes. it helped for a while. then i funked out again. why is it that when i consciously try to stop beating myself up i seem to do it more and harder? when people think i'm doing well is when i hide this about myself, but when i express what's going on in my head all of a sudden i'm depressed or not happy or something. it's true. when i keep my thoughts to myself, i do better. when i talk about them or vent or something, they are more real all of a sudden and more poisonous. then i read this post and think i am absolutely ridiculous. who wants to be around that? i don't even want to be around that. now i want to scream.
waaaaaaaaah.
better. thanks.
the company that handles contracts for Ft. Bragg's early intervention hasn't called me back. i suppose that has added to my feelings of unworthiness. i was so excited about making the decision to check out that possibility. maybe the lady is on vacation. maybe she will call tomorrow.
the caffeine is wearing off and i need to prepare therapy for my kiddos tomorrow.
i hope i get paid soon. being broke sucks. especially when i've been working.
peace and love.
1 comment:
Hey I was going through the same thing and the the next day I got the call on the new job. It's the military, lots of paperwork, be patient.
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